Beware of these dastardly denizens while camping in provincial parks

The sounds of nature and the outdoors are unmatched in their beauty – and they also cannot compete against the raucous sounds of man-made noise.

Earlier this summer, I spent two days camping in nearby Golden Ears Provincial Park, just about an hour’s drive east from Vancouver.

Let me say we’re very fortunate to have such a beautiful park, such natural beauty and wilderness so close to one of Canada’s largest three cities. I thoroughly enjoyed hiking on its trails, canoeing on Alouette Lake, just getting out-of-doors, away from the city.

Let's go camping! Just watch out for weird species...

Unfortunately, some people cannot bear to leave the city behind. And some choose to ignore rules that are implemented for everyone’s safety and comfort.

Rather than rail against humanity in general, I thought it would be interesting to identify the types of odd and often contrary beings one sees when visiting provincial parks like Golden Ears.

If you see any of these weird and inconsiderate species, avoid them if at all possible (and if possible, report them to a park ranger).

Caninus releasus. These creatures let their dogs run loose, off-leash, without any care for the rules. In just about every national and provincial park, dogs are supposed to be leashed. This is for the protection of the park, and the creatures that live there. It’s also for protection of dogs and their people. Dogs can hurt the smaller animals like birds and small mammals that live in the park. And if they happen to disturb a bear, it could cause dire consequences for the dog, even for the human, and unfortunately, often the ultimate demise of the bear. 

Although It’s very clearly spelled out on signs, online, and in park literature, when I was hiking on two different trails and even in the campsite areas, there were far more dogs off-leash than on. Too many of these C. releasus types think they have control of their dog with their voices – but they don’t!! It may only take a second or two for disaster to occur, before a dog responds to its owner’s voice (and often they are out of sight on a trail). I for one, don’t feel comfortable walking on a trail where a big Rottweiler or similar dog is running free.

Cyclistes ignoramusi. Like the C. releasus creatures, these types feel free to ignore signs that say “NO CYCLING ON THIS TRAIL.” There are specific trails for cyclists in the park, yet members of this particular specie choose to blatantly ignore such postings and cycle merrily down the path that is obviously NOT supposed to be used for cycling. Wonder how they’d feel if I rode a motorcycle down their city cycling paths?

These are the ONLY kinds of dogs that should be off-leash in a provincial park.

Flamus controllus. With all the dry weather and recent fires in B.C., not just this summer, but in past summers, you’d think people would be a little careful about campfires – particularly when there is a ban on in the park. Yet while hiking on one of the trails, I smelled wood smoke from a fire burning somewhere nearby, which tells me a member of the F. controllus species was in the area. 

A sub-species of this animal is F. controllus gassy-goofus; this sub-species brings portable gas-powered “fireplaces” to the great north woods to enjoy its cozy glow at night – which is allowed. However, they turn it up higher than allowed by park rules, turning it down low when they know a ranger is patrolling the area, then turning it back up when the coast is clear.

Loudus inconsideratus. This species demonstrates a variety of behaviours, but they’re all consistent in two respects: they are loud and they don’t care if they bother others in surrounding campsites. Sometimes it’s a loud radio (why go to the woods to escape the city – then blare your music?), other times its loud talking well after midnight, sometimes it’s just banging around, doing stuff that makes noise louder than necessary that prevents others from sleeping or just enjoying the quiet of the outdoors.

Pinheaded powerboatians. These are the types that zoom up and down a lake in their powerboats, creating wakes with no regard for people in canoes or kayaks and the potential danger created by the unstable movement of their craft due to the unexpected waves from the motorboats. Their motors also sound annoying.

Despite signs indicating "No cycling,"
we encountered cyclists on this trail.

Clueless camerus shutterbuggus. You’re trying to line up a shot of a rare animal or bird, you patiently, quietly, and slowly approach it, trying to get the best angle and not frighten it away, sitting, waiting for that perfect moment when you can press the shutter to capture an image … then this species – hailing from the city and with no clue as to how to approach wildlife – stomps right over toward the subject on a direct line, and invariably in front of your camera trying to get a shot, scaring the critter away before you can get your shot. 

They’re characterized by their use of a camera phone or cheap point-and-shoot and loud, colourful clothing that brands them as being from the city as well as brand new to any kind of nature photography. 

They are often also accompanied by one or more Screaming spoiledrottenoids, smaller versions of themselves who also do everything they can to ruin the shot and the moment.

REMEMBER: If you do see any of these weird species, try your best not to shoot them, stab them, or otherwise kill them, because unfortunately, they are never in season.

Although it sure would be nice if they did declare even one weekend to be open-season on any of these annoying animals…

No time for a long paddle? Try Deer Lake in Burnaby

You don't have to be a rocket scientist - or even a brain surgeon! - to figure out that I love to paddle. (Just look at the name of this blog.)

But I can't always get away for a three- or four-day trip; sometimes it's tough even to get away for a day, even out to a place as close as Pinecone Burke Provincial Park (where there's great canoeing) or to Bowen Island (for kayaking).



Off we go, into the wild blue -- er,
the urban wild blue yonder.

But about 15 minutes away from where I live lies Deer Lake Park. It's a small lake, not even as big as Burnaby Lake Regional Park, but it has one advantage over BLRP: you can rent canoes and kayaks at Deer Lake; you can't do that at Burnaby Lake (although there is a boat launch there, if you bring your own canoe or kayak).

The boat rental facility is seasonal, mind you. After Labour Day weekend, you really need to phone them the day you plan to go to see if they're open, especially on weekdays. Of course, if you have your own canoe or kayak, you don't have to worry about that.

Deer Lake is not challenging, it's not demanding, it doesn't even take very long to paddle around the entire perimeter of the lake. But if you're looking for a nice quiet paddle, a respite from the hustle and bustle of the city, and you don't have much time, you really can't beat it.

There are plenty of ducks and geese there to keep you company on the lake, and they don't seem to be too shy of paddlers, probably since they see them there all the time. If you get close enough to the shore, and have a pair of binoculars, you'll probably be able to spot some songbirds, as well - maybe even a wild squirrel! And overhead, if you're lucky, maybe a raptor will wing its way past you.

One of the striking things I found about paddling there is the way I was within a few metres of wild waterfowl, quiet woods and still water - but if I turned my head and looked in another direction, I could see high-rise buildings off in the distance.

Map of Deer Lake Park,
source: City of Burnaby Parks Dept.

They're far enough away that they don't disturb the ambiance of the lake. It really is quite quiet there, at least during the week, and especially when school is in session. I can imagine it might be a bit busier during the summer months, unless you get on the lake early or late - which you can do, as long as you have your own watercraft.

I'm surprised it took me eight years of living in Vancouver before I actually visited the spot this September.

While that may be my first visit, it certainly will not be the last time I dip a paddle into the waters of Deer Lake.

(If you want to see more pictures taken while paddling at Deer Lake, check out my Facebook photo album, Deer Lake Paddle.)

Getting out: rec sites offer a great alternative to B.C.'s provincial parks

So summer is here, and the first of three long weekends in Canada (not counting the Victoria Day weekend in May) has come and gone. That leaves two long weekends - the August long weekend and the Labor Day weekend - plus many other two-day weekends for those of us who love the outdoors and like to use the weekends to get and enjoy some time "roughing it." 

That term has many different meanings, depending on who you talk with. For some folks, even glamping is considered "roughing it," while for others, kayaking down a river in the Amazon can be considered "soft adventure" as long as you have a guide, and you don't have to cook or set up your own tent.

Then of course, there is car camping.

Again, that ranges the gamut from big honking RV's that are larger than some people's houses to drive-in tent sites where you pitch a pup tent to sleep in.

While I prefer to be some place really wild, a place where you can only get there by paddling, I do enjoy car camping on those weekends when I don't have the time (or inclination) to plan and carry out an overnight canoe or kayak trip. I don't like RV's, but I prefer something bigger than a pup tent, something like the SE Woods dome tent that you put up just by pulling on a knob. Now that's convenience!

Be it ever so humble, there's no place like "dome" ...

 Of course on long weekends - or even some two-day weekends - finding an empty campsites in B.C.'s provincial parks can be problematic, especially if they're close to Vancouver.

I found that out the hard way, last year. Planned a camping trip to Golden Ears Provincial Park. About an hour from Vancouver, you cannot make reservations there on Friday or Saturday nights. We got there about 5 p.m., but there were no sites left. We ended up staying in Harrison for a few nights, but our last night, we spent camping.

But not at Golden Ears. Or any provincial park for that matter.



The Chehalis River - 20 yards from our tent.



We stayed at a B.C. Recreation Site.

What's the difference, you ask?

Mainly price. And a few amenities. Oh, there were fire rings, firewood provided, picnic tables ... everything you need for a fun and successful camping trip at the Chehalis River Recreation Site.

 No flush toilets, though. No on-site stores, boat launch ramps or lodges, as there are in many provincial parks. They don't have canoe or kayak rental facilities, either; we had planned on taking advantage of that in Golden Ears. However, during our stay in Harrison, we did rent kayaks and spent an afternoon paddling a short distance up the Harrison River and back again.

As for all the other facilities...

Did we miss them?

Nope.

Would we go back there again?


Where are the smores?



Yep.

So the next time you're planning a camping trip in B.C., don't limit yourself to provincial parks. There are plenty of recreation sites where you can camp that are just as nice as their larger and more developed cousins.

If you are planning a trip, the recreation site link above will help. Still set on going to a provincial park? Check out the B.C. Parks website. Another good resource is Camping British Columbia by Jane Seagrave. The book features all the provincial and national parks found in B.C. (but not the recreation sites.) Another helpful website is HelloBC.

But whatever choice you make remember one thing:

A poor day camping beats a good day doing almost anything else.